I have a confession to make. It’s been five years since any of my kids took a book out of the local public library.
A lot of moms have one thing that simply puts them over the edge — the third cup of apple juice spilled, kids having accidents long after they’re potty trained, homework forgotten at school on a daily basis. For me, it was lost library books. There was a point at which book due dates became more important to me than work deadlines.
And that’s when the shopping began.
At first it was a book here or there. But now I order at least one a week for my 7-year-old and 9-year-old. I order somewhat less frequently for my 3-year-old, but I expect that’ll change soon.
I get recommendations from friends and book reviews, and requests from the kids — who have started getting recommendations from their friends. If they like the first book, I’ll order every one in a series.
Some are used. But many are new. And thanks to Amazon Prime, they arrive in two days — sometimes less.
There’s nothing like a package waiting for them on the doorstep to get kids excited. My daughter had a Kindle, and downloading a new book just didn’t have the same effect. In an era when most of our communication is done online, having something real arrive by mail with your name on it is a special experience.
My kids are enrolled in a program called PJ Library, which sends free Jewish-themed books to kids’ homes. It seems to capitalize on this same sense of joy that comes when someone sends you a present in the mail.
When a book arrives, they rip open the packaging, feel the cover, study the illustrations, read the description and then run off with it, so their siblings won’t be able to get a hold of it.
Of course, I buy books that they may all eventually get to read but when I first buy, it’s with one kid in mind.
My seemingly excessive book purchases aren’t limited to Amazon. They also happen in bookstores. I can’t imagine taking my kids on a shopping spree in a toy store. (We buy them toys, but we go to the store for very specific items.)
On the other hand, I’m happy to go into Barnes & Noble or a smaller outlet and let them each pick out any three (or four or five) books they want (in addition to a couple I might pick out for them).
I used to worry about how long each book was going to keep them occupied, about whether it was worth it to get the hard copy or wait till a paperback was available. I used to keep track of whether they had read all the ones that I had purchased on the last trip.
Now I just add them to the pile.
Books have become treats. Almost all the birthday presents I buy for their friends are also books. I ask the kids to give me recommendations of books they think other kids will like.
Who knows? Maybe the other kids are unexcited when they open their presents at home. But for my kids it helps preserve the notion that books are gifts in every sense of the word.
When I interview parents of kids who love reading and being outdoors, who aren’t glued to their iPads all the time, they tell me that what matters is the “family culture” they create.
They warn that saying no to kids all the time is just going to create resentment. What you have to do is find ways to say yes.
And not just for the kids. I get tired of saying no and books give me a way to say yes. A lot.
I’m lucky that I can humor my kids’ every whim when it comes to books. No doubt I spend more money than I have to on books. I wouldn’t want to show my Amazon order history to older generations of my family.
But spoiling my kids with books is something that gives me great pleasure. I buy my children a lot of books because they like reading, but I also think they like reading because I buy them a lot of books.
Like all kids, they enjoy owning things. And while I’m not trying to encourage crass materialism, I think that they should take pride in the books they own — particularly once they’ve finished reading them.
Naomi Schaefer Riley is a senior fellow at the Independent Women’s Forum.